


Reminiscing

by yarnsky4



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Adora (She-Ra) Needs a Hug, Adora/Catra is implied, Angst, Dialogue Heavy, F/F, Gen, Takes place in Season One, kinda a character study
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-30
Updated: 2020-08-30
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:20:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26189392
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yarnsky4/pseuds/yarnsky4
Summary: After saving Bow and Glimmer from the Horde and having the princess alliance be disbanded, Adora can't stop thinking of her failures.
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	Reminiscing

**Author's Note:**

> It's been a little while since I've watched the first season, so I might have made some little mistakes, but I hope you enjoy my little 1 am ramble about these characters!

Adora wanted to fix things. 

She sat in her room at the palace of Bright Moon, staring down at the sword in her hands, given to her by Catra.

She wanted to emerge triumphant, a savior of the people. The mission was set up perfectly, just like any other dangerous battle against the Horde. They’d get in and fight. Adora knew how to fight. But she didn’t know how to deal with consequences. 

It had been partly successful. Bow and Glimmer were safe. Yet it seems every victory came with a cost. A princess left behind for dead. 

And then there was Catra, who wouldn’t even fight her. Adora couldn’t rid the look on Catra’s face from her mind. Why wouldn’t she join her? 

Adora took a deep breath, running a hand through her hair. There was so much good they had done, but the thought of her failures couldn’t leave her mind. It was like a vine constricting her, squeezing her until she could feel the shame burn in her body. The tightness of her chest felt exactly like she imagined someone stabbing her would feel like. She needed to get up and do something, anything to distract herself. 

She stood up from her bed, hand wrapped tightly around the sword. Of course she’d be the one to receive it. Of course she’d be the one to have all this power and still fail. 

Adora let a yell of frustration out and slammed her fist into the wall, ignoring the dent she left. Her hand throbbed in pain, but it was a better feeling than everything else. For the first time since joining the rebellion, she wished she was back in the Horde so she could use her old punching bag. With another shout, she struck out again, this time swinging her sword out in front of her to rip the curtains on her window. 

Adora kept going, swing after swing, ignoring the torrent of falling fabric around her. Everything was a blur. The only thing that mattered was the ache in her arms and the anger in her heart. 

“Why. Do. I. Always. Fail?” She spoke each word under her breath in between every swing. Looking up, she realized there were no more curtains to rip. They were surrounding her on the ground, creating a sea of red. 

With a sigh, Adora, threw her sword to the floor, falling to her knees. 

“I’m so weak.” 

“Adora?” 

She looked up to see Glimmer hesitantly peeking into her room. 

“Glimmer!” Adora quickly stood up. “I-I don’t want to bother you, you’ve already got all that glitching going on.”

Glimmer pushed the door all the way open and stepped in. “That doesn’t matter. I thought I heard yelling. Are you alright?” 

“My curtains sure aren’t,” Adora stared at the ground, where the fabric lay. 

Glimmer sighed. “Adora, don’t deflect the question. What’s going on? Is it about Catra?” 

Adora jerked her head back up at the mention of Catra’s name to see Glimmer standing with her hands on her hips and an eyebrow raised. 

“So it is.” 

Either it was a lucky guess, or Glimmer must’ve been sharper than Adora gave her credit for. 

“Like you said, that doesn’t matter.” Crossing her arms over her chest, Adora walked to look back out of the window, over across Bright Moon. “The only thing that matters is making sure the Horde never hurts anyone again.” 

“Of course it matters. It matters to _me _. I’m your friend.” Glimmer walked up behind Adora and put a hand on her shoulder. In the reflection of the window, Adora could see the concerned look on her face. “I… saw the way you looked at Catra. She wasn’t just a fellow soldier back when you were with the Horde, right?”__

__Adora had never thought about it before, but Glimmer never knew Catra as anything but an enemy. She couldn’t possibly know how it felt to have to fight someone that knew you like the back of their hand. The pain in knowing that everything had changed and you could never go back to days of naive happiness._ _

__Finally, Adora responded. “You’re right.”_ _

__“She was your friend?”_ _

__“More than just a friend...”_ _

__Glimmer’s mouth opened in a wide ‘o’ shape in realization. “I get it no-” Her body suddenly glowed red and she spasmed, yelling in pain._ _

__“Glimmer!” Adora turned around and grabbed her by the shoulders. “Are you alright?”_ _

__Thankfully, Glimmer turned back to normal, but she was breathing heavily and her eyes were unfocused._ _

__“Glimmer?”_ _

__The pink-haired girl shakily nodded her head. “I-I’ll be fine.”_ _

__Adora sighed in relief. She might’ve been feeling awful about the rebellion disbanding, but Glimmer had to handle that responsibility along with the pain of glitching._ _

__“Anyway,” Glimmer started, “You were saying that you and Catra were tog-”_ _

__“We were best friends,” Adora finished for her._ _

__“Oh, uh, of course,” Glimmer said, cheeks pink with embarrassment for reasons unknown to Adora._ _

__Walking right past the other, Adora started to pace the room. “I can’t believe she stayed with the Horde. I mean, doesn’t she care about all the lives she’s hurt? Doesn’t she care about being on the side of good? About the years we spent together?” Adora waved her hands in the air as she spoke, growing increasingly frustrated. With a shuddering breath, she sat down on her bed and quickly wiped away the tears growing in her eyes, hoping Glimmer didn’t see. “Does she even care about me?”_ _

__“Adora… don’t you think Catra would be feeling the same as you? If you two knew each other for so long, it must’ve hurt both of you a lot to leave the other.” Glimmer sat down next to Adora on the bed, looking up at her with concern._ _

__Adora knew Glimmer was right. In the many times that Adora had fought Catra since joining the Rebellion, Catra would tease her or even lash out with anger. Despite that, there was always hurt in her eyes. Knowing Catra, she must’ve taken Adora leaving personally. She must think Adora betrayed her._ _

__“It did…but I don’t regret it.” Adora looked back at Glimmer and gave a small smile. “After all, I would’ve never gotten to become friends with you and Bow.”_ _

__“I’m glad you did,” Glimmer grinned back. With a content sigh, she leaned her head to the side to rest on Adora’s shoulder. “I just can’t imagine you actually having fun with Catra. She seems like she’d be an awful friend.”_ _

__Did Glimmer really think so lowly of her? Logically, Adora knew she shouldn’t care what Glimmer thought. If anything, she should dislike Catra too now. But it still hurt to hear someone talk about her former friend that way._ _

__“Catra _was _a good friend,” Adora said in a defensive tone. “Growing up in the Horde was tough, but we could always count on each other. She was funny, and smart, and, and… she actually cared about me. Now she hates me. Now everyone hates me.”___ _

____Glimmer looked shocked to hear this. “Adora, no, the princesses are just upset. If anything, I’m the one they hate. I wasn’t the leader I should’ve been.”_ _ _ _

____“Well, that makes two of us,” Adora frowned at the ground._ _ _ _

____“Adora, we gotta find a way to fix this.”_ _ _ _

____“I’m not in the mood.”_ _ _ _

____“We can go find Bow and-”_ _ _ _

____" _Glimmer _."___ _ _ _

______The pink-haired girl flinched, looking at Adora as if she was going to attack her. Adora didn’t realize she had said it so harshly, but she didn’t have the willpower to keep up polite conversation._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Like I said, I’m not in the mood.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Glimmer nodded and got up from the bed. “I get it. I just hope you can come to your senses and help out.” Walking back to the door, she glanced over her shoulder to give Adora one last look. Adora avoided meeting her eyes. A second later, she heard the door slam shut. She was alone again._ _ _ _ _ _

______In a way, Adora could almost imagine Catra in the way Glimmer looked at her. The same furrowed eyebrows, the same disapproving frown. She seemed to push both of them away the same way too._ _ _ _ _ _

______Adora groaned and laid down onto her bed, staring up at the ceiling with her arms and legs extended out. She’d never be able to get Catra out of her mind. Glimmer deserved better from Adora. She’d go find her and talk it out, hopefully coming up with a plan for the rebellion. But for now, Adora needed time alone._ _ _ _ _ _

______Later, she’d be able to talk with Glimmer. With all the other princesses. She’d find a way to make them forgive her. Maybe, someday, she’d even be able to talk with Catra, but as friends again._ _ _ _ _ _

______It sounded impossible, but as Adora laid down and reminisced about their days together where they thought they could do anything together, it made her feel hopeful. For now, that was all she needed._ _ _ _ _ _

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
